Fun Time with the RHPS characters as teens
by Darrien Criss the Domestic
Summary: Frankies gonna get naughty, janets gonna get slutty, and brads gonna get... no ass XD rated M :D                                                                        Imap /Sent      x
1. Chapter 1

***Franks POV***

Its almost spring break bitch! The time where girls get wild, drugs get bought, and boys get in trouble for their girlfriends ending up dead. Yes, a beautiful time in every teenager's life. To make this the best spring break to ever be in Denton I'm having my own party and I'm inviting all my bitches and bastards. "Attention fuckers and fuckettes!" I announced to my homeroom. "I, Franklin Nathaniel Furter, am having a bad mother fucking ass party Saturday. If you have plans, cancel them. If you don't come you'll be considered the biggest lamester faggot or dirty slut in the entire 8th grade. Kay? Any stupid questions sponsered by betty?" betty raised her hand. "what?" "What's the dress code?" "What? Damn it, betty, I don't give a unicorn fuck if you come naked. just clean yourself up before you come." she high fived Janet. Magenta raised her hand. "Yeah?" "Why would we wanna go to a pool party at your house? we could all get pregnant. Your pool could be full of frank juice." "you would know. last night was the best night of your life." the class "ooh"ed and magenta threw a textbook at my crotch. "you wouldn't wanna hurt your favorite ride at the arousal park, now would you Genta?" she flipped me off and called me foul word in French I suppose it was. "anyways. if you wanna come, call my mom BEFORE Saturday dipshits. Don't rsvp the day of the party and be a douche. Kay?" the bell rang and we went to our next class.

**Math (first period)**

"Hey columbia!" she ran over to me and held out her hand. "you know about the party?" "genta told me. gimme invite." I held it up and made her jump for it. "what would you do-oo-ooh. for a klondike bar?' she got down on her knees, unbuckled my pants, reached into them, and squeezed my dick. "holy great bowie almighty great balls of fucking glitter!" "thank you." she kissed me on the cheek, smiled, then skipped off to her seat. I texted my mom to come get me and gave columbia the rest of the invitations and the guest list.

I was lying on an ice pack watching Spongebob and my phone rang. "I wanna fuck you like an animal..." I picked up the phone and crossed my feet. "Hey sexy." "Frank vhat the fuck is up vith my invitation?" "What do you mean, what's up with your invitation? I loved it." "Frank you wrote "Vear something skimpy or nothing at all. Itll be off faster than you know it anyvays vinky face?" I laughed. "Did you like my drawing?" "Vhat is it?" "Those two little circle are heads. and the top circle is connected to the middle part and the right half of it..." "Riffy vhat is this supposed to be? A vhat? FRANK YOU NASTY FUCKER!" "how did you remember you said that last night. I mean your head was hitting so hard against the head board I never would have guessed-" the phone went dead. oh well. she knows she digs me. "Frankie bear?" "Yes mommy?" "Help me with dinner!" I put the ice pack in my pants, and walked downstairs.

***FRIDAY AFTERNOON AFTER SCHOOL***

"Hey, Coco!" I called in the hallway. She turned around and skipped up to me. "Yes, Frankie?" "You coming tomorrow?" "Of course! My mom called last night while I was supposed to be asleep." I gasped. "What are you gonna wear?" "I found this really cute blue floral two piece at forever 21. I'm gonna look absolutely fabulous." "I got a fantazing pink Speedo in Academy and I'm gonna wear my trunks over it but when I get in the pool I'm gonna take my trunks off." I smiled and we locked arms and walked to my mom's car. "Mom, can Columbia stay at ours tonight? I want someone to help us to help us with the set up tonight." "Sure. Just call your mom and tell her and we'll drive over there and get your clothes." We hopped in the backseat and buckled ourselves in.

It was 8:30 and Columbia and I were cuddled up under my black zebra striped bed set eating cereal and watching Spongebob. "No offence Frank but Spongebob is like really gay and he should just come out of the closet." I gasped. "I think so too! Its really fucked up how the writers just make him straight even though he's obviously dating Patrick." I grabbed the box of pops off of my nightstand and poured them over my milk. I handed the box to Columbia and we continued ranting about spongebob and patricks secret homosexual relationship. At about 11:30 we got tired of watching tv and decided to just sit in the dark talking. "Frankie?" "Uh huh?" "On a level of 10 to 1000 how high do you think Bettys I.Q. is?" "Honestly? Maybe a 4." She laughed. "Columbia?" "Yeah?" "Do you think there's anything wrong with me?" "No. I think that you are just perfect in every way possible. Every girl I hang out with has a gigantic crush on you believe it or not." "Even Magenta?" "Even Magenta. She blushed when she read your card. Poor little thing looked like a fluffy strawberry." I smiled and sat up on my elbows. "Then why does she always act like she hates me?" She sighed and played with my curls. "Because she wants to preserve her innocence. You know how you are." She kissed me on the cheek then turned on her side. "Night frankie." "Night."

***SATURDAY ABOUT 10:00 a.m.***

"Mom! MOM!" I screamed from the top flight of the stairs. "What, Frankie?" "Where are my trunks and speedo?" "In your underwear drawer!" I went into my room and Columbia screamed. "Frank I'm getting dressed!" I just walked to my drawer and ignored her. "Jesus Columbia, you're acting like a virgin. Calm down." She finished putting on her swim suit and as I walked past her I said "Nice tits, coco." She threw a flip flop at me and i closed the door. "Hey Frank! Do you want mini sandwiches or burgers and hot dogs?" I looked her in the eye and put my hand on her shoulder. "Mom. You know I'm on a meat once a meal one a month diet. Sandwiches please. And don't get too crazy with the cheeses. I don't want chunks blown where I have to swim." She smiled. "You're a very different little boy." "I'm a transvestite mom. Thanks."

Around 12:00 people started pouring in. First riff raff and magenta, then rocky, then janet, and brad and all the other little fucktards. "Omg Frank this party is awesome!" Betty said pretending to be drunk on a blue slushie. "Shut up, betty." I walked off looking for magenta, who was dipping her feet in the pool. "Sup Fluff?" She jumped a little bit. "Hi Frank. Nice party." "Thanks. Uh I'm sorry about being a Wikipedophile. I just really like you but I have bad ways of expressing my feelings." She blushed and kissed me on the lips. I stood up, stripped out of my trunks, and danced to sexy and I know it... which Magenta seemed to think was hilarious. Columbia came like out of Jesus's ass and pushed me into the pool, completely ruining my hair. "Columbia and Magenta! You, you, you. BRAAAATZZZ!" We all laughed at our inside joke of our favorite movie and they decided to join me in the pool. "L. U. V. Betty! Y. O. U. You wanna?" "Betty, go make out with Janet!" "Okay?" Betty, being the simpleton that she is, walked up to Janet and planted a big, hot lesbian kiss on janets poor, innocent, closet lesbian mouth. "Betty what the heck?" "Frank asked me too!" "Since when do we listen to Frank?" "Since you made me send you that picture of him so you could touch yourself!" Everybody laughed as Janet ran away blushing and Betty ran after her, mindlessly.

After some extreme poolside fun I called evrryone to the basement for spin the bottle. "Okay, okay! Circles everybody! Get in a goddamn circle!" Columbia yelled at everyone as they scrambled to get in a boy-girl-boy-girl pattern. "Alright! Since this is my party and my mom doesn't give a hot sweaty one night stand wha we do as long as no one gets knocked up... so we're gonna play spin the friggin bottle. Ill go first and who ever I want it to spin on, it'll spin on. So magenta lets go in the closet." She blushed and we stood up and ran to the closet. I was on the inside of the closet so I imagine that all they heard were giggles, moans, and thumping, Lots and lots of thumping. Columbia spinned and she ironically landed on brad... who refused to kiss anyone who isn't Janet. So she spinned again and she made out with rocky. The spin the bottle thing lasted till people got tired and called their parents to come get them. Columbia and magenta stayed so we could do "spring break things" and watch a girls gone wild infomercial. "Oh my god this is hot." "Frank this is disgusting. Turn it off." "No... its actually quvite nice. Leave it frank." "Magenta are you turning gay?" "No, but I'm getting awfully turned on and its scaring me." "Okay, ill change the channel." "No, leave it! Its sexy!" There was nothing on TV so we all cuddled up, talked about sex, and fell asleep


	2. Gentas Turn

*Magentas POV*

Coco, Franktard, and I all woke up about the same time; 1:00. It was lunch time normally but we just sat in the bed and scarfed down fruity pebbles for an hour. "This is ironic," I said, "a fruity pebble eating a fruity pebble." Columbia laughed and Frank looked confused. Poor Frankie didn't know any joke that wasn't perverted or sexual. I don't see why this kid isn't a dad already, he's already done me, Columbia, Janet, brad, and probably riff too. Ugh. I just threw up in my mouth a little bit. "Janet is a total hypocrite slutbag, but as much as I hate her I think she's really hot." Frank said out of nowhere. "Maybe it's because you have an innocence fetish. You probably get turned on my ignorant religious whores." Columbia replied. "I think I do. I see a girl walking out of church on Sunday and I immediately wanna fuck her brains out... I'm scared for myself you guys. This isn't healthy." "No, its healthy. You're a Furter. Your libido is inherited through generations and generations of sex gods with sexy British accents. No need to worry. We love you, sex or more sex." I laughed at the thought of frank creeping on some poor little church slut. I could only imagine what would happen if he dad saw him. Can you say "bible throwing"?  
>A weird little song was playing and Frank pulled his phone out of his crotch and wiped it with this hand. "Oh its just Janet texting me. Uh "Frank when are you not busy?" When you're cock blocking..." "Let me text back! Okay. Uh. "When I'm thinking about you I'm always busy."" Frank laughed and Columbia asked Frank "Frank why do you phone there?" "I don't have tits and I'm always on someone do you know how easy it is to get pick pocketed when you're getting your dick sucked?" "No. But I know how easy it is to get pick pocketed when you're getting ea-" "Holy shit! Janet sent you a nude!" "Lemme see! Oh god the things I can never unsee." "So she IS a natural blonde... whoa her boobs are better than Columbia's." Coco hit him and left the room to put the dishes away. When she came back Frank was in the bathroom with the phone. "Is he?" "Uh huh."<p>

Poor Frank is never satisfied. After his alone tine he had to go at it with me AND Columbia... luckily his mom wasn't there. I don't think she would've cared anyways, I'm pretty sure that she's alright with her baby Frankie being a man whore as long as he doesn't get anyone knocked up. He told me that he got two shoeboxes full of condoms for his fourteenth birthday and used more than half of the first box already. Not that I'm complaining or anything. Its not like I'm a total slut or anything, because I'm not. I just like sex is all. And Columbia, Frank, AND EVEN JANET feel the same way. "Magenta, you're loud." "And you're good in bed. Now are you gonna sit here and complain or are you gonna clean up this mess?" "You mean evidence of fantastic fucks from Frankie Furter then yes we should clean up this mess. I totally forgot that these sheets are black and I don't want wetness and skeet all over where I have to masturbate. Put your panties on and grab the gain... were going to the laundry room."

We all went downstairs in only our underwear and attempted at cleaning franks sex stained sheets. "I have no idea what to do." Frank said as he stared at the washing machine. "You guys have never done laundry before? Wow. You must not live with my mom." I said matter of factly. "My dad does all of my laundry for me." Columbia said smiling. "I guess ill do it. Frank go get me some clothes." He ran upstairs, got me a My Little Pony shirt and I got to the laundry. About an hour later the sheets were done and when when I went upstairs to give frank and coco the stuff, I walked in on some seriously x rated shit. "OH GOD! OH GOD WHY?" "IM SORRY!"Frank called after me but didn't care enough to come after me. I found a landline a d dialed my mom. "Hello?" "Hi Genta." "Mom come get me." "Is there a proble-" "Nope just come. Please." She sounded worried. "Alright. Ill be over in a few." "Thanks."

Mom picked me up twenty minutes after the incident and dropped me off at the house. "Genta I need to go to Wal-Mart. Maysin is asleep or just in his room lying around. If you get hungry, you know where the food is. Only girls can come over and I don't care what franks gender is today, no." "Don't worry I don't plan on seeing him for a long time. Bye mom." She drove off and I walked in the house and riff raff was frying bacon naked and singing. "Hey soul sister, ain't that mister mister on the radio, stereo. The way you move ain't fair ya know..." "Hey soul sister I don't wanna miss a single thing you do... tonight." He jumped when he saw me and covered his penis with his hand. "Magenta what the fuck?" "Riff raff what the fuck. You were naked baconing. Not me." He rolled his eyes and left to put his pants on. When he walked back into the kitchen he asked if I wanted some bacon and I asked him if he wanted food from someone who cooked naked and he ate the bacon by himself. I was tired and it was only like four o'clock so I went in my room, turned the tv to LOGO, and fell asleep to the sound of The RuPaul's Drag Race theme song.


	3. Bradgenta Y'alls!

**You wanted Bradgenta, I'm giving you Bradgenta. The fight was really fun to write because I love making up things for them to fight about. Okay so for all you shippers... merry christmas (I love saying that).**

***Janets POV*  
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>"Of course I think you're cute, brad." Lies. "Yes I do think that other girls call you gay because you're not a sleaze." Lies. "Yes you're a good person." Lies times seven. "Yes I do think you're a good kisser, Bradley. I have to go." Brad being a whiney little bitch again. I don't think God will punish me for those lies. Its not like I'm Honest Abe or something... everyone lies. Its natural, and whatever my punishment is it can't be anything worse than having to kiss Bradley Peter Majors. He had an older brother who was in high school and he was almost as good a kisser as Frankie. No one is a better kisser than Frankie. "Janet! Was that Brad?" "Yes, Mother! He wanted to know what day the test was!" "Oh. Wasn't he at school last week?" "He stepped out to use the restroom!" I walked into the kitchen and Mother was making us lunch; grilled cheese and ham sandwiches. Our favorite. Jamie and Jacob came running to the bar stools the second they smelled the cheese. I walked to my room and lied down on my hello kitty bed set. My phone buzzed, but sadly it was just a text from Brad asking me if I wanted to go see a movie. I said I was busy then texted Frank to see what he was doing. He caught an attitude immediately because he was asleep and my stupid ringtone woke him up. Fuck him.<br>"Lunch, Janet!" I walked to the dining room and took a seat in between the twins. "This is good mommy. Thank you." "No, I only get part of the credit. God is the one who blessed us with this food." "Thank you God." Jamie said. I giggled and finished my food. "Janet do you have any plans for tonight? I would like you and Brad to watch your siblings together." Oh god. Another purity test. "Whatever you would like. May I ask where you and the Majors' will be tonight?" "We're going out on a double date. We haven't had one since high school." She laughed at her comment and I went to my room to take a nap before Brad, Baby Brad, and Bradette showed up.

**7:30**  
>"Okay, Janet and Brad. We're trusting that you two get the kids in bed by 9:15 and fed by 8:00. They've already had baths so all you have to do is play with them, feed them, and put them to sleep. We'll bed back after 10:00... maybe 11:00. If all that is finished and the house is clean then you'll both get no church for a month and $50. Capishe?" "Capishe" we replied in unison. Our parents kissed us on our heads and disappeared. "So Janet... the adults are gone, the kids are playing outside, you wanna go get comfortable?" I panicked and came up with the best lie possible when I panic. "I can't I have to get started on dinner." He shrugged "Oh. Alright." I went to the kitchen, took out some macaroni and cheese and French fries, and got started on the food. I boiled the water, dropped the macaroni in the pot, and went out to the backyard to watch the kids with Brad. His little sister and little brother, Malachai and Meridith (also twins, but two months older than my brother and sister), were goofing around with Jamie and Jacob on the giant jungle gym my parents got set up last weekend. I hate that thing. Its ugly, and blue, and draws attention to the neighborhood kids who are all snot nosed little pricks. "Janet, you're awfully quiet. Is there a problem?" Yes. You and your family are here. "No. Just a little thinkative." "Oh. Okay." I went back in the house, started on the fries, and around 8:10 dinner was served and we all sat at the dinner table in silence.<p>

"Jacob and I are gonna get married." Brad spit out his Kool-Aid. "What?" "I, Meridith Amy Majors, am getting married to Jacob Michael Weiss." "You guys are too young to be married." "Nuh uh. Malachai says when you have sex you're married so he and I are gonna have sex because I wanna marry him." Brad's jaw dropped and I chocked on my fried I was laughing so hard. "That's not true. When you get married you have sex. Marriage ALWAYS comes first." Brad said sternly. I leaned over to Meridith and whispered "He's just saying that because he's a virgin." "Haha! Brad is a virgin!" He nearly had a heart attack when his poor, innocent 8 year old sister said the v word. "Janet!" "Brad!" "Janet!" "Jacob!" "Meridith!" "Jamie!" "Malachai!" "Janet this is not acceptable behavior for 8 year olds!" "Don't bust a nut Brad, ill warn them not to repeat anything. Mereidith that word I said was very vulgar and you should never ever say it." "Bust a nut?" "No, but that too." "I want to change my name, Janet." Jacob said. "To what?" "Attila the Hun. It sounds very powerful and biblical." "Ill tell you what. If you all clean your plates and get on your pajamas before Brad and I finish these dishes, ill calk you whatever you want AND you all can watch a movie while you sleep." The kids jumped up, washed their plates, and ran to their separate rooms. "Janet I don't think that what you told Meredith was acceptable behavior for someone of your religion." "Oh calm down I was just having a little fun with them. I think its cute that Jake and Meredith want to get married." "Yes but all that sex talk was unnecessary." "I honestly have no idea where they got that from. Maybe school." "They're in private school, Janet." "Private school schmivate school. Just because they wear plaid doesn't mean that they don't learn the same inappropriate things as other kids." He frowned up his face and offered to finish the dishes so I dried my hands and went into the kids rooms.

"Meridith and Jamie, what do you want to watch?" "Barbie at Swan Lake!" They yelled. I looked at the clock; 8:45. We're making great progress. I put on the movie, wished the girls goodnight, and turned out the light, and went to where Jacob and Malachai were supposed to be sleeping. "Attila and Malachai, stop wrestling and get in bed." "But bed is for sleepy heads and we wanna wrestle." "Wrestling is violent." "Violets is fun!" "Bed or no transformers." "We don't have that anyways, Janet. I'm not stupid." I rolled my eyes and dragged them into bed." "The bible says not to lie with another man!" "He meant have sex with, Malachai." "I feel like a homo, Janet!" "I'm sorry if you feel gay. Take that up with yourself if you can't sleep with another man without feeling homosexual vibes." Jacob laughed and put his pillow at the other end of the bed. "Happy, Malachai?" "Super." "Good, now watch Hercules and go to sleep." The little girls were asleep and within 30 minutes the boys were too.

I walked into the living room and Brad was talking into his iPhone."Of course I love you, Genta." Pause. "Look, my family wants me to date Janet." Pause "Of course I love you more than her. She's terrible." That's not what you said when you were shoving your tongue down my throat. "What I wanna do to you? It involves whipped crème, my mouth, and your tickle spot." I started crying silently. Magenta? He's cheating on me with that fluffy haired freak? "Next time I come over I'm gonna fuck. Your. Brains. Out." I took off my sparkly tom and threw it at the fireplace making him nearly shit bricks. "Magenta I have to go. I love you. Bye." He stood up and turned around wide eyed. "Hello Janet." "Don't "hello Janet" me. You asshole you were cheating on me!" "Its not like you weren't sleeping around with that man whore frank!" "Frank was better than you in more ways than one!" "Well at least Magenta is faithful! She didn't go around fucking every boy that said she was attractive." "I did not Brad Majors! If that was true I would've fucked you ages ago!" "Oh no need for that! I've got a girl that doesn't pretend to like me so she can suck me up!" "I don't know Brad! I was pretending all this time and you never knew! Maybe she's faking too!" "I knew you were faking, Janet! That conversation this morning? I know when you're lying! You aren't as cunning and smart as you think you are!" Tears started coming faster and by this time I was sobbing. "You said you loved me Brad!" "You said the same thing... looks like its possible to love someone one second and hate them the next." He sat back down on the couch. "Is it because I never gave you what you wanted? Is it because I never wanted to have sex with you brad is that it?" "No, but it was part of the reason!" I waited for an explanation and wiped my eyes with the back of my hand. "You know how I know that you were cheating on me with Frank? Last week when I was sitting in your room, you left your face book on." "Okay, so?" "Damn it will you let me finish! The chat pinged and when I went to see what it said it was frank giving a very specific description of what happened that Saturday we were supposed to go out. So I was walking down the street that night crying like the little bitch that you think that I am and I saw Magenta. She asked me what was wrong and I told her "My girlfriend has been cheating on me with Frank. I'm pissed the fuck off." And you know what she did?" "Gave you a boner like everyone else does?" "No, you bitch, she listened. She listened to me complain, and whine, and bitch just like I do with you everyday. And after all that she actually asked me to see her again and the day after that, the Sunday I got out of church for faking sick, she and I went at it like a porno all afternoon. While you were at church being a hypocritical little slut I was being honest with myself and having the best time of my life fucking a girl with a Romanian accent." "So basically when I was telling Frank "stop frankie I'm dating brad. He gets on my nerves but he's a decent person" you were on top of that red haired Dracula bitch?" Our parents walked in. "Hello everyone!" "Save grandma! Janet I didn't know that you were stopping..." "No! Get out of my fucking house." I ran at him swinging and he ran out the door like greased lightning. I was chasing after him and as I was passing by him my dad grabbed me and picked me up. "Daddy let me go! He was having sex with that slut magenta last weekend! He wasn't sick he was cheating on me let me go dad I wanna slit his fucking throat!" My dad put me down, I ran and cried to my mom, and our dads chased brad down the street, dragged him back, and kicked his little white ass. If I wasn't completely flipping my nuts, I could've sworn I heard the woodchipper…

I never thought I'd cry as much as I did the day Brad and I broke up.

**Some music I used for writing this chapter: Rumor has it, someone like you, and rolling in the deep all by**___**Adele. **_**Save me by Theory of a Deadman. Hole in my Soul by Aerosmith (my favorite bnd besides my chemical romance). Closer by Nine Inch Nails (my favorite song). Goodnight and Goodbye by the Jonas Brothers. No regrets.**


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